HOW WOMEN KEEP POINTS ON THEIR MEN

Have you thought about how we collect pluses and minuses on each other?  You say something nice about me and you have earned a plus but say something to hurt my feelings and you receive a minus.   The problem is that it takes a lot to earn a plus and very little to receive a minus.  Thus, husbands especially, often live in the deficit area.  That’s because women expect more from a relationship than husbands typically do.  That’s God’s doing.  Remember His punishment for Eve was that she would want a close connectedness with Adam, while he would focus on making a living.

Women save points for the small things a husband does, but she gives them a lower value than a husband thinks they are worth.  Then she inflates points with each hurt, disappointment, or annoyance, probably much more than she should.  Regularly, she subtracts her man’s negative points from his positive points and many men end up in debt. . .  deep debt. 

Fellas, let me share a few of the ways that a woman rates you.

NEGATIVES:  She asks, “Do I look fat in this?” (-5)  There is no answer you can give that won’t cost you points.  If you hesitate before answering (-10).  If you ask, “Where?” (– 35).  You develop a potbelly (-15).  You wear baggy jeans so your undershorts occasionally show when you bend over (-30).  You say, “My belly is no worse than yours”  (-500).  You offer to take her to dinner and go through a drive-thru window (-10).  You ask her to go to a movie without telling her you bought tickets for “Men in Black" (-35).  You fall asleep when she wants to talk about something that to her is a serious problem (-100).  You make the bed but forget the decorative pillows (-2).  You walk away and leave her alone at a party (-5).  You go talk to another woman for longer than 3 minutes (-25).  The woman is pretty and single (-40).  You buy an impersonal gift for a female friend of her’s while on vacation without buying her something nicer (-40).  Fellas, it’s not being thoughtful of her friends, it’s putting another woman ahead of her.  Shame.  Make that a -75

POSITIVES:   You crawl out of bed and go downstairs during the night because she heard a noise (+3).  You find nothing (+0).  You take her to dinner on her birthday – to a place she really likes (+10).  You go see a movie about relationships and say you enjoyed it (+15).  You change the TV to a love story in the middle of the game (+25). You sit facing her and look into her eyes when she wants to talk (+5).   You say, “Un-hun,  Oh-ooo” as she tell you her concern (+2).  You say, “I am sorry this hurts you.” (+25).  You ask what you can do to make things better – and follow through, doing what she says (+40).  You load or unload the dishwasher or washing machine/dryer (+1).  Remember it’s your dirty dishes and clothes too.  You bring her flowers or a nice card (+5).  You write her a love note, telling her all the things you love about her (+100).  The note is handwritten and mailed (+400). 

Okay, fellas, now you know how to earn points and come out ahead.  Are you known for following advice?

Who Do You Trust the Most? It's Decision Time

Why is it when we do something wrong and another points it out, we become upset with or even angry with the person telling us, not ourselves?   Is it because  the person forces us to make a decision? 

We either choose to draw closer to the one wanting us to live so we go to heaven or we withdraw from that person and choose to turn to the ones who would support or even encourage us in our wrongdoing  -- and

who are contributing to our missing heaven.  

There’s only two choices.   As Jesus said, “You are either with me

or against me.”  There’s no middle ground or third choice.   

How sad we often let pride, hurt, money, loneliness, and misunderstandings cause us to miss the one thing that should mean the most to us.  Hell is described as a horrific place, so much worse than our feelings of  some emptiness today. 

If we would choose to pursue ways of overcoming  our aching deficits in moral ways and seek God’s help, He would not only heal us, He would fill us with more than we humanly need.  But, realizing this creates another decision time.

Sometimes letting go of what’s wrong  and sinful in our lives is more scary than trusting the Lord to supply what we are currently missing.  Yet, we know that God won’t answer our prayers while we willfully continue in our sin.  He only responds when we repent and change.

One of my favorite Scriptures is in James that says “We don’t have because we don’t ask.”  God wants to fill us completely with what we need.  He doesn't want us hurting or lonely.  He doesn't want us hungry or estranged.  So the question is: Have you asked the Lord to relieve your pain?  Or do you trust yourself and, perhaps, another to satisfy what’s missing?  It's another decision time.

We can pretend we aren't making a decision, but we can't avoid doing so.  Our actions display our choices.